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Movie Frenzy
At my house, we are great movie goers. I am not very a very picky movie goer either. I can name the movies I classed irredeemable on one hand. (Hannibal, Blair Witch Project, Payback are 3)
So I won't trash Troy. Some spoilers in the following.
I liked it. The story flowed easier than the actual Iliad though I don't see why they felt compelled to change the plot as much and leave the Olympians out of it altogether.
On to the movie itself.
Orlando Bloom was pretty. And he got to shoot arrows. And kill Brad Pitt. We got to see the curve of his fine ass. And it is nice. That is about all i can say about him.
Brad Pitt was pretty too and he got to fight and fuck... a lot. And we got to see the curve of his fine ass, several times. That is about all I can say about him.
Eric Bana was passionate and beautiful. We got to see him fight and his lovely chest. He made Hector come to life as a living breathing man that loved his family and stood by his brother no matter how stupid said brother was. He also was the real star of this movie.
Sean Bean gave his usual excellent performance. My favorite character has always been Odysseus and Sean was great. He was handsome and he played the part perfectly. We didn't see the curve of his ass but we did get to see his legs! And he was Odysseus... I only wish someone would make The Odyssey too and have Beanie play him again.
Peter O'toole made my heart ache as Priam. He was wonderful too. Man, is he looking old!
The boy who was Patroclus was pretty... um really pretty. I have slashy thoughts about him. And Pitt. I went to the IMDB to find info and found that he is young and every under 21 person on earth went to high school with him. La!
The score was HORRID! Why they used that nasty sounding Middles Eastern wailing shit I do not know. It was flat ugly and very annoying to listen to. Maybe they should have checked a map to find out where Troy and Greece are!
The wide scene of a thousand ships was simply breathtaking.
That's about it. On the whole, I liked it. No It wasn't The Iliad but I enjoyed it anyway.
I HAD to love a movie that started with the words "It's alive, it's alive." In a world where every movie takes itself ohhh so seriously, this one was a hoot.
David Wenham stole the show completely as the cheeky Friar Carl, who is NOT a monk yet so is free to curse (Damn!) and fornicate.
Hugh Jackman was pretty enough to lick! And big and fierce and sexy as hell.
And Dracula! Ye gods, what a hottie. He's an Aussie named Richard Roxburgh who was in Moulin Rouge and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Dracula likes to walk on the ceiling and has a lovely ponytail.
Kate Beckinsale is certainly not the annoying nurse in Pearl Harbor nor the girl in the GAP commercial with Orlando. She is an ass kicking babe! Her corsett thing was distracting though!
He is joined by other monsters... werewolves, Frankenstein and the lovely Mr.Hyde. This movie was a bit short on plot but was a couple of hours of good monster killing fun!
If you want to have a good laugh and some fun, see this one.
Hellboy- cute and funny. The fish guy was the coolest.
The Punisher- Graphic violence that you can cheer for. And Thomas Jane is hot... there are many shots of him in very low hanging pants that made me drool.
Man on Fire- Long, intense and not for the faint of heart. This movie is violent, not the kind you can laugh at. Denzel Washington gives a great performance as the bodyguard of a kidnapped child. It was filmed on location in and around Mexico City and no place I've ever seen looked filthier or more unpleasant. I don't think the tourist bureau will use this to attract visitors.
And that is that!
So I won't trash Troy. Some spoilers in the following.
I liked it. The story flowed easier than the actual Iliad though I don't see why they felt compelled to change the plot as much and leave the Olympians out of it altogether.
On to the movie itself.
Orlando Bloom was pretty. And he got to shoot arrows. And kill Brad Pitt. We got to see the curve of his fine ass. And it is nice. That is about all i can say about him.
Brad Pitt was pretty too and he got to fight and fuck... a lot. And we got to see the curve of his fine ass, several times. That is about all I can say about him.
Eric Bana was passionate and beautiful. We got to see him fight and his lovely chest. He made Hector come to life as a living breathing man that loved his family and stood by his brother no matter how stupid said brother was. He also was the real star of this movie.
Sean Bean gave his usual excellent performance. My favorite character has always been Odysseus and Sean was great. He was handsome and he played the part perfectly. We didn't see the curve of his ass but we did get to see his legs! And he was Odysseus... I only wish someone would make The Odyssey too and have Beanie play him again.
Peter O'toole made my heart ache as Priam. He was wonderful too. Man, is he looking old!
The boy who was Patroclus was pretty... um really pretty. I have slashy thoughts about him. And Pitt. I went to the IMDB to find info and found that he is young and every under 21 person on earth went to high school with him. La!
The score was HORRID! Why they used that nasty sounding Middles Eastern wailing shit I do not know. It was flat ugly and very annoying to listen to. Maybe they should have checked a map to find out where Troy and Greece are!
The wide scene of a thousand ships was simply breathtaking.
That's about it. On the whole, I liked it. No It wasn't The Iliad but I enjoyed it anyway.
I HAD to love a movie that started with the words "It's alive, it's alive." In a world where every movie takes itself ohhh so seriously, this one was a hoot.
David Wenham stole the show completely as the cheeky Friar Carl, who is NOT a monk yet so is free to curse (Damn!) and fornicate.
Hugh Jackman was pretty enough to lick! And big and fierce and sexy as hell.
And Dracula! Ye gods, what a hottie. He's an Aussie named Richard Roxburgh who was in Moulin Rouge and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Dracula likes to walk on the ceiling and has a lovely ponytail.
Kate Beckinsale is certainly not the annoying nurse in Pearl Harbor nor the girl in the GAP commercial with Orlando. She is an ass kicking babe! Her corsett thing was distracting though!
He is joined by other monsters... werewolves, Frankenstein and the lovely Mr.Hyde. This movie was a bit short on plot but was a couple of hours of good monster killing fun!
If you want to have a good laugh and some fun, see this one.
Hellboy- cute and funny. The fish guy was the coolest.
The Punisher- Graphic violence that you can cheer for. And Thomas Jane is hot... there are many shots of him in very low hanging pants that made me drool.
Man on Fire- Long, intense and not for the faint of heart. This movie is violent, not the kind you can laugh at. Denzel Washington gives a great performance as the bodyguard of a kidnapped child. It was filmed on location in and around Mexico City and no place I've ever seen looked filthier or more unpleasant. I don't think the tourist bureau will use this to attract visitors.
And that is that!